March 8, 2001
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by Alexander Reginald Cutting, III
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Guys, we all know that when we pledged Phi Alpha Tau, we took an oath of brotherhood, friendship, and loyalty. And now, at the hour of our photography, let us not forget the most important oath of them all -- seriousness.
I plead to you to take your composite picture seriously. When our house gets visitors from national, or the occasional trickle of people from campus who come to our study parties, we want them to see that we take our collegiate endeavors seriously. Let us not be willy-nilly in our motives: seriousness is the key.
My brethren, the most noble and pressing duty: to preserve and uphold the morals of this sacred gathering of Greek souls. Act like a gentleman, always wear clean underwear, and avoid alcoholic drinks and sex before a devoted marriage. But above all, please, just be serious.
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by Corky "Spankmaster" Orwell
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Yo guys, I have the best idea! Let's all get drunk and take composite pictures. It's going to be a blast! I have my 35 millimeter camera all fired up and ready to go. You should be too!
Oh come on, it'll be great. We can make faces or pick our noses. That way when people come over they can see how much fun we have -- even when it comes to more formal events like photography. If we're coordinated enough, we can have our retarded faces form a symmetry. Like, I know Tooter can contort his face like a palsy victim too, so he would be opposite me on the same row. Get it?
You know what I just thought of? Maybe, like Giblet and Tall Mike could wear togas, and then Chris and Jiggler could wear firmen hats and nothing else? I think that would be funny. Ha ha. Yeah, funny.
So if you're interested, let me know. OK guys? Guys?
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